I can’t begin to describe how much I loath how becoming a better man is really just a way to launder phobia for the most popular folks who try to exemplify it in social performance
“Oh I’ll teach you how to be a man, a man is someone other men fear, because he’s anti other men, he’s anti himself, he hates women too but to a lesser extent because being the opposite of them is also what defines his manliness - here let me quote some olde timey philosopher who wrote his closeted craving for cock into just what I mean as a metaphor for war”
Being a man means being confident enough to accept other humans that don’t validate your masculinity by performing it in competition. I can be a man and root for you, my lane is my lane, and it’s got some camp in it because camp is funny too - ashy fucks
This is a level of honesty and directly challenging what we've been told we're supposed to be! As another definitely Not Straight Colin (spelled the Right Way) Im so glad I found this! We can never fix it until we are able to directly look at and describe whats happening. For the sake of men and Women who've had to deal with repressed, shamed, angery, and isolated men for all these years.
Im always tempted to ask how did this start. I imagine some horribly traumatic scene on a hunting party that scarred and also bonded a group of men for life while separating them from the rest of the tribe, and even other men who weren't there, by the aggressive and often unexplainable behavior that comes with trauma. And society is just finally getting around to a place of being ready to deal with it
check out my stuff! Christ Like Suffering is my lore of dealing with internalized homophobia. a lot, and i mean a Lot a lot happened witu bullying in school but that took a backseat at the time and you can see the work, so far
Raw, and incredible share. Really appreciate the vulnerability man. I can relate to a lot you’ve shared here, comforting to know we’re not alone in our crazy experiences as men
This is quite interesting to me. I'm bald, muscular, and have a mean-looking face. Because of that, no one's ever questioned my manhood. But I also terrify the shit out of women, and it's difficult to date when you appear unapproachable and unfriendly. On top of that, women automatically assume I have a harem on standby and will cheat on them.
A woman I was hopelessly and utterly in love with rejected me because she said she "didn't want to be a cuck". Two years later I still think of her daily.
So I've been forced to adopt behaviors which soften me up. *Forced* to snuggle kitties, even. It's awful. This animal looks at me like I'm the entire universe and starts vibrating. How gay
I think being gentle is a lost part of humanity that has floated away on the wind for some reason. I think we could all use a little more gentleness. Glad you enjoyed the piece!
The way you write is so funny to me. I’m giggling kicking my feet the whole time.
What a great piece and astute exploration of your life experiences and identity!!! I have a best friend I met in high school who went through VERY similar things in school because of his body language and his closeness with girl pals. And I myself have always struggled to think of myself as “feminine”, which is sort of a flip side of your whole piece.
🙂↕️🙂↔️that feels like a hug. Thank you so much Shay — I’m glad I’m not the only one who feels this way and hopefully can allow other people to tell their story.
Very interesting. My guess is that in more sexist times, males ironically had greater latitude of masculine expression. Poetry, fashion, music, cooking, design… many things now coded feminine would not have been seen that way at all. (No advocacy here, just an observation)
Oh for sure — masculinity has changed so dramatically over the years. Read the history about high heels and makeup! They were male aristocracy things!!
You talk as if the most troglodyte notions of gender segregation are dominant in the US. In the real world, we live in an advanced Western society, and both men and women are allowed a range of different personal styles and preferences. Nor does an aesthetic sensibility necessarily code as feminine -- great artists, architects, composers and chefs are men.
What is annoying, and what seems feminine in an unattractive way, is the lengthy navel-gazing about your emotions and feelings. You just go on and on about your feelz.
Plus, the skin care routine. That is definitely not normal.
This is pretty gay of you
And that’s why u like it
This hits. It’s liberating. It’s an anthem and I’m grateful that someone called it for how it is.
Steve!!!! My guy — thank you so much. Hopefully more men will share stories similar to mine to show others it’s okay to feel like we do
Wonderful piece. I can so relate this ...all of this.
Thank you so much!
This was wonderful!
I can’t begin to describe how much I loath how becoming a better man is really just a way to launder phobia for the most popular folks who try to exemplify it in social performance
“Oh I’ll teach you how to be a man, a man is someone other men fear, because he’s anti other men, he’s anti himself, he hates women too but to a lesser extent because being the opposite of them is also what defines his manliness - here let me quote some olde timey philosopher who wrote his closeted craving for cock into just what I mean as a metaphor for war”
Being a man means being confident enough to accept other humans that don’t validate your masculinity by performing it in competition. I can be a man and root for you, my lane is my lane, and it’s got some camp in it because camp is funny too - ashy fucks
ASHY FUCKS IS RIGHT, Dookie Boi LaCroix.
I’m glad you enjoyed and can relate — it’s about damn time we start callin’ em out
This is a level of honesty and directly challenging what we've been told we're supposed to be! As another definitely Not Straight Colin (spelled the Right Way) Im so glad I found this! We can never fix it until we are able to directly look at and describe whats happening. For the sake of men and Women who've had to deal with repressed, shamed, angery, and isolated men for all these years.
Im always tempted to ask how did this start. I imagine some horribly traumatic scene on a hunting party that scarred and also bonded a group of men for life while separating them from the rest of the tribe, and even other men who weren't there, by the aggressive and often unexplainable behavior that comes with trauma. And society is just finally getting around to a place of being ready to deal with it
Colin’s unite!
check out my stuff! Christ Like Suffering is my lore of dealing with internalized homophobia. a lot, and i mean a Lot a lot happened witu bullying in school but that took a backseat at the time and you can see the work, so far
I def will! Todays the perfect ‘catch up on reading’ day for me
btws ur photography is really cool, once my art website it updated we should talk visual art 🎨
You seem like a pretty hozier-coded guy and I mean that in the best way possible
I … 🫵 I’ll take it. I love the mountains
Raw, and incredible share. Really appreciate the vulnerability man. I can relate to a lot you’ve shared here, comforting to know we’re not alone in our crazy experiences as men
Thank you Nick I really appreciate it
This is quite interesting to me. I'm bald, muscular, and have a mean-looking face. Because of that, no one's ever questioned my manhood. But I also terrify the shit out of women, and it's difficult to date when you appear unapproachable and unfriendly. On top of that, women automatically assume I have a harem on standby and will cheat on them.
A woman I was hopelessly and utterly in love with rejected me because she said she "didn't want to be a cuck". Two years later I still think of her daily.
So I've been forced to adopt behaviors which soften me up. *Forced* to snuggle kitties, even. It's awful. This animal looks at me like I'm the entire universe and starts vibrating. How gay
I think being gentle is a lost part of humanity that has floated away on the wind for some reason. I think we could all use a little more gentleness. Glad you enjoyed the piece!
That is a lot of growth. Thank you for sharing. *followed the aesthetic Insta
Thank you so much Karina!
I have so much respect for you now Colin. Wow seriously, I've never loved something that came from a guy until I read yours. 🫶🏾 And you're so funny 😭
Janu!!!!! THANK YOU so much. Your words mean a lot. I appreciate this friend
The way you write is so funny to me. I’m giggling kicking my feet the whole time.
What a great piece and astute exploration of your life experiences and identity!!! I have a best friend I met in high school who went through VERY similar things in school because of his body language and his closeness with girl pals. And I myself have always struggled to think of myself as “feminine”, which is sort of a flip side of your whole piece.
🙂↕️🙂↔️that feels like a hug. Thank you so much Shay — I’m glad I’m not the only one who feels this way and hopefully can allow other people to tell their story.
Very interesting. My guess is that in more sexist times, males ironically had greater latitude of masculine expression. Poetry, fashion, music, cooking, design… many things now coded feminine would not have been seen that way at all. (No advocacy here, just an observation)
Oh for sure — masculinity has changed so dramatically over the years. Read the history about high heels and makeup! They were male aristocracy things!!
Super proud of you, Colin. I’m glad to know you. 🫶🏻
Thanks brothaaaaaaa
I haven’t read this yet but I will. Just wanted to say I also hate when it’s just about my monster dong 😕
Me too :/ I much more than that
You talk as if the most troglodyte notions of gender segregation are dominant in the US. In the real world, we live in an advanced Western society, and both men and women are allowed a range of different personal styles and preferences. Nor does an aesthetic sensibility necessarily code as feminine -- great artists, architects, composers and chefs are men.
What is annoying, and what seems feminine in an unattractive way, is the lengthy navel-gazing about your emotions and feelings. You just go on and on about your feelz.
Plus, the skin care routine. That is definitely not normal.
Thanks Pete🫶
i love this
Appreciate this GG!